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Post by hoofie on Jul 18, 2019 10:48:59 GMT -7
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Post by hoofie on Jul 19, 2019 5:26:58 GMT -7
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Post by hoofie on Jul 22, 2019 5:22:03 GMT -7
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Post by hoofie on Jul 24, 2019 9:19:22 GMT -7
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Post by hoofie on Jul 26, 2019 10:33:48 GMT -7
A man found a tennis ball while out jogging and put it in his pocket to give his dog back home. As he stopped to wait at the traffic lights, a woman next to him couldn't help but notice the large bulge in his trouser pocket. "Tennis ball" the man said. "Oh, that must be painful, she replied". "I had tennis elbow once!"
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Post by hoofie on Jul 28, 2019 11:59:08 GMT -7
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Post by hoofie on Jul 30, 2019 4:52:42 GMT -7
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Post by hoofie on Aug 2, 2019 10:32:47 GMT -7
In the great days of the British Empire, a new commanding officer was sent to a South African bush outpost to relieve the retiring colonel.
After welcoming his replacement and showing the usual courtesies, gin and tonic, cucumber sandwiches etc) which protocol decrees, the retiring colonel said "You must meet my Adjutant, Captain Smithers. He's my right-hand man and is really the strength of this office. His talent is simply boundless".
Smithers was summoned and introduced to the new CO, who was surprised to meet a hunchback, one eyed, toothless, hairless, scabbed and pockmarked specimen of humanity, a particularly unattractive man less than three feet tall.
"Smithers, old man, tell your new CO about yourself".
"Well, sir, I graduated with the sword of honour from Sandhurst, joined the regiment and won the Military Cross and Bar after three expeditions behind enemy lines. I've represented Great Britain in equestrian events and won a Silver Medal in the middleweight boxing division of the Olympics. I have researched the history of.".
At that point, the colonel interrupted "Yes, yes, never mind that Smithers, he can find all that in your file. Tell him about the day you told the witch doctor to kiss your ass!"
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Post by hoofie on Aug 9, 2019 6:05:10 GMT -7
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Post by hoofie on Aug 13, 2019 5:48:11 GMT -7
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Post by hoofie on Aug 14, 2019 5:52:57 GMT -7
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Post by hoofie on Aug 15, 2019 6:10:12 GMT -7
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Post by hoofie on Aug 26, 2019 4:29:52 GMT -7
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Post by hoofie on Aug 28, 2019 6:18:28 GMT -7
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Post by hoofie on Aug 30, 2019 5:35:11 GMT -7
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